Several years back Korean Air was having more plane crashes than any other airline. It was so bad the FAA stopped all relationships with them, not allowing connections with any US based airline. After some serious humility, the problem turned out to be authority. That's right. Planes were crashing because of lack of authority. The copilot had very little say in his duty. If he felt the pilot was being unsafe or in an unsafe environment (say flying to low, or too fast, or even too slow, etc) he didn't speak up. His culture was that of most dads and their kids. Most. Not mine.
Their are things I do that are unsafe. And I need people to remind me that I'm being unsafe. I need to know someone notices the environment I'm creating. The unsafe environment.
The Korean copilot was taught, through his culture, to respect authority, and to not question it regardless of the situation.
RyRo and I were recently driving down the interstate. I looked over at him & noticed a serious look of discouragement. I asked what was wrong. And with this puppy dog face he said "I'm scared".
"Why are you scared?"
"Because you're texting and driving."
I immediately apologized and put my phone in his lap. But I also blamed him... somewhat. Not in a sense that he was in trouble, but in a sense that he didn't speak up.
Long ago I told him and Sean to help me not text and drive. Slap my shoulder. Call me out. Whatever it took to remind me that I'm creating an unsafe environment.
It Can Wait is hard to implement. I need help. I need to understand the environment I'm creating. And sometimes I can't do that on my own.
I don't want to be like a Korean Air pilot. And I for sure don't want my boys to be like their copilots.
They've since made significant changes to their culture, and in doing so, created a much safer environment. Matter of fact, it's now one of the safest.
Maybe we need to make some of those same changes.
I want Sean and RyRo to be difference-makers. And I'm not too proud for that difference to be made even in my life.